Visiting Karen

I think it is very brave of me to try to heal my relationship with Karen, despite how badly she has treated me, but she is fat now and unattractive.  I think she deserves a cute friend to give her something to aspire to.

I took out the fruit tray Merlin put together for me yesterday and walked through our backyard, the way I have a million times before and I honestly felt a little teary remembering all of our happy times together.

I could hear her inside talking with someone, so I knocked on the door and guess what?  She didn’t even answer.  Is that the rudest thing you have ever heard of?

Who does that to a neighbor?

Luckily I found Röbert’s extra Visa card in an old suit jacket in the attic so I ordered her a very lavish arrangement.  Let’s see her ignore THAT!

A Strange Feeling

I have had the eeriest feeling lately.   I keep thinking there is someone following me or standing in my backyard.  When I look there is no one there, of course.

When I just slipped out back to avoid talking to Röbby about some ridiculous camping trip he wants the family to take, I swear I could smell smoke, and not cigarette smoke.  It smelled like the old wacky tabaccy, if you catch my drift.  At first I thought maybe Karen’s sons were home from school, but her house was dark.

I am sure it is nothing, but it does make me feel a teensy bit uncomfortable.

It’s So Hot!

A new family moved into our neighborhood last weekend, so, of course, I stopped by with a bottle of wine to catch the mom, Tabs, up on all of the local goings on and be neighborly.  She and her husband came by on Sunday afternoon for a lil’ get to know you barbecue with the usual gang, Krystyn and Wesley, Cari and Mitch and all of the kids.  Fortunately for us, the Watsons have children who will be in the same grades as my children this fall, and Starling, Merlin, Alcott and Hemingway have been inseperable all week.  To thank me for having them basically move into my backyard while she unpacked, Tabs offered to take them with her to a water park today.  The kids were dressed and ready by the door at about 6:30 this morning!

Of course I raced over to the gym to grab the last spot at child care for Hummus, and came home to try on outfits for my trip next week.  Did I mention that Röbert is whisking us all away for a fun-filled family vacay on Saturday?  I am very excited.

Right now it is so hot out.  The only bad thing about summer (besides stinging insects and having to watch children all day every day) is the heat!  I don’t like to just give up like a lot of people I see around town, but honestly, sometimes it would be more comfortable to wear nothing at all.

Cool and classy. No frumpy t-shirts for Lah Lee!

Since I realized how fantastic I look in hats, I have gone on a bit of a shopping spree.  Shhh, don’t tell!  I think this one is going to be perfect for the mountains!

A lil’ floppy and unstructured, but still very cool.

I think it was very thoughtful of Röbert to choose a mountain destination instead of the beach.  The cool mountain air will be quite a relief after this hot and busy week!

Feeling Blessed

The foreign family down the street has been out of town this week, but I kept hearing noises from their house.  Finally last night I made Röbert come walk by the place with me to see if he heard it too.  It sounded like distressed animals.  I love animals so much, and this was the family who had Beefeater hidden in their garage last summer, so I insisted we call the police. When the police checked it out the basement was filled with caged dogs, including Dementor.

This picture was from the news this morning. I am being hailed as a hero!

I have no idea what they intended to do with all of those dogs.  They were contacted and claimed they had no idea what the police were talking about.  Most of the dogs were returned to their owners, who said they had just disappeared this morning.  Strange.  I have contacted Ty to let him know that we will keep Dementor here safely with us until he gets home,  He sure sounded relieved.  I wonder if Renata had something to do with the dog theft ring?

Pool Issues

Yesterday I was so happy to see good old Karen bustling around and getting ready for cocktail party at her home.  She used to throw lil’ get-togethers around her pool almost every weekend in the summer, but since we had our tiff, she has seemed down and less social (and fatter).  Anyway, it is important to keep yourself busy, and I was glad to see Karen getting ready for a few friends yesterday.

Unfortunately, late afternoon, when she ran out for a few minutes, her whole pool seemed to back up somehow and it was a real mess.  It was filled with leaves and dirt and who knows what else, and the pump was broken.  Poor Karen!  She had to have her party indoors because her normally beautiful garden was a real eyesore.  I don’t want to have to call anyone, but if she doesn’t get taken care of soon, then I might have to let the zoning people and the bug people know that she has this unsightly, unmaintained mosquito breeding ground in her backyard.  It would be a shame if she had to get rid of her pool.  She loves that pool almost as much as her husband and dog.  Ooops!

It seems like she just doesn’t care anymore.

A mutual friend told me at the grocery store this morning that there was a part missing from her pool that is also out of stock at every pool store for miles around and it will be a few weeks before they can get order it and install it.  It is a tiny little part, just a few pennies, but it has to be ordered from Asia, so her pool may be out of service for the rest of the summer. Poor Karen.  What did she ever do to deserve such terrible luck?

 

What is Going On?

I got up a little early today to make sure that Merlin and Starling got on their bus.  Röbert was acting like a big mope all weekend, and I frankly didn’t trust him to do his job and they needed to be back in school.  Like yesterday.

Röbert was a little more himself this morning and when I suggested that he come home early so we could have a special dinner tonight he said he’d like that.  He also told me that he won’t be doing as much travel for work for awhile.  Röbert and I have what I would describe as a nearly perfect marriage, but I have to admit that the for the last few weeks he has seemed a lil’ preoccupied, so I am relieved to have my old sweetheart back.  I even asked when we could go kayaking together, so you know I’m feeling that loving feeling, LOL.

After he left for work I could actually hear Karen screaming and crying from next door.  Wow. They must have had a damaging water leak or maybe even a small fire at their beach house.

I had missed my AM Zen Weight Bearing class at the gym because Röbert and I were having our little talk, so I did a quick workout on my own while Hummus ate a nutritious granola bar for breakfast.

I was sorry to miss class, but oh well.

I was just finishing up and getting ready to head to school for our first end of year party meeting, when I heard someone in the front hall.  I was so surprised to see Mitch there, and it looked like he was heading off on a long trip!  He seemed very flustered and told me how much he admired me, which was very sweet.  I know I am a good neighbor and have been a wonderful friend to his shrew of a wife, but it is still kind of him to say so.  He said that he won’t be around for awhile and he gave me his phone number.  Then he looked all serious and said he wanted to tell me something important.  Of course I was already late for my meeting so I said we had to talk later.  I can’t imagine what he wanted to tell me.  Probably something about his crazy wife, but I have heard enough about her already!

I wonder where he is going?

The meeting went VERY well.  Cari and I are the co-chairs of the End-of Year Party Committee for Starling’s class.  Everyone knows that this is the most important party of the year and a real opportunity for us to shine.  Fat Alice’s mom and the Wozinski woman from next door both also wanted to be in charge, but we had spread sheets from the Christmas party at Amber’s last school, so they will be working for us.  I am thrilled.

Party Animal

The Super Bowl party was loads of fun, but I woke up with a my grain this morning.  I let Röbert get the kids off to school and I think he dropped Hummus at my mother’s house.  I am not sure.  I should probably check his room and make sure he is not in there still.  He can be extremely quiet.

Everyone came except The Wozinskis and Ty.  I was pretty sure he would be attending a hipster party but I bought some IPA for him just in case.  I know he is not a neighbor, but he is my friend.  Val came, and she is not a neighbor.  I haven’t heard from Ty for quite a while.  I should stop by school and see him one day.

The food was fantastic.  Karen had gone all out and made all kinds of homemade sandwiches and dips and even fried her own potato chips.  She made a cake for dessert that looked like a stadium with lil’ players and everything.  At the last minute I had run over to the convenience store and picked up some trays and stuff, so I set those up in the room where we watched the game (like my book club reads books, LOL) and then I put Karen’s stuff in the pantry with my kale salad etc.  For some reason no one ate any of that stuff, so we had it for breakfast this morning.

It looks so tempting, right?

Röbert seemed a lil’ miffed that my friends and I were talking throughout the playing part of the event, but we were quiet during the commercials, which is all anyone cares about anyway.

One crazy thing happened.  Do you remember Merlin’s chicken from last summer?  The one that suddenly disappeared?  Well apparently Birdy somehow ended up at the house belonging to the people who don’t speak any English, and they brought it back last night.  Ugh!  I would have thought they would have some ceremony where they slaughtered live chickens or something, but it is back in our house.  I tried to give it back to them, but they seemed to think I would be happy to see it.  They wouldn’t take no for an answer.

At least one person is happy.

Super Bowl = Super Fun

Well, I am very excited about the super bowl thing this evening.  For the first time in quite some time we are hosting the party here!  I sent out e-iinvitations to everyone in the neighborhood except the Wozinskis.  I even invited that crazy family who don’t speak any English, because I want the Wozinskis to realize that I didn’t invite them on purpose.  I hope they feel as bad as I did the day they refused to homeschool Starling for me.  I want them to feel that bad every day for the rest of their lives.

Anywhoo, there was some crazy mixup because it turns out everyone was already invited to the Sullivans.  I called Karen and asked how she had managed to lose my invitation AGAIN!  Honestly, she is such a space cadet.  She seemed flustered and upset and agreed to move her party here.  She is bringing her food so I went to the gourmet grocery this morning and picked up some healthier alternatives.  I am sure her dips and chips are fine for most people, I won’t judge, but I want everyone to be able to nibble on some bruised kale salad and vegan gluten free pizza at my house.

I saw some millet kale crackers and decided, what the heck, buy those too! It will be quite a party!

The one bad part is that Karen insisted that the Wozinskis be included, so I promised to call them and invite them myself.  I am going to make it clear by my tone that I don’t want them to come at all.  I am pretty good at that sort of thing.

Happy Basketball everyone!

 

Holidays are a Time for Friends

One of my greatest blessings this year has been my friendship with Karen.  She is a LOT older than me and she harbors a vicious dog in her home, but I love spending time with her.  We had a bit of a rough patch after I was attacked by Beefeater, but now we are back to our old besties relationship.

BFFs 4evah

Since we live right next door to each other, I like to just pop in.  Recently, Karen seems a bit uncomfortable when I stop by, especially when Mitch and Röbert are both out of town.  I tease her about her “secret life”,  LOL.  Do you think she might really have a secret life?

 

So tonight I invited her over to my home and we drank leftover punch from last night when i had my younger, fitter friends from the gym over for a real party.  It was nice just to catch up and not worry about the past.  Happy Holidays, Karen.  ILYLAS.

Still Shaking!

I just had the most unbelievable experience at the Sullivan’s house.  Karen and I were getting ready to go to pilates and she asked me to run up to her son Roger’s bedroom to grab her gym bag while she answered the phone.  When I got in there Beefeater was on the bed, enjoying a lil’ nap in the sun, as dogs do.  I took the bag and as I passed the bed I may just have slightly touched the dog with the corner of the bag.  I could hear Beefeater start to growl behind me and omg!  He attacked me!

This is a vicious, ferocious animal.

I have never been so scared in my whole life!  I ran from the room and shut the door behind me.  Karen ran upstairs and we could hear the dog flinging himself against the door.  I showed her the selfie I just happened to be taking at the moment he attacked and she was truly shocked.  Beefeater always seemed to be such a pleasant dog.  Now he seems like a monster.

Obviously we cancelled our pilates and Karen called Mitch to come home and a vet to come sedate the dog.  I don’t like the idea of living next door to such a vicious animal, especially with three lil’ angles running around my yard and now the Wozinskis on the other side of us have children as well.  Poor Karen has some thinking to do!

Since pilates was off I came home and put on my snuggly fall clothes and had a couple of glasses of wine before the children got home.

What a beautiful fall day!