Krystyn is a true friend!
Poor Cari took a bit of a tumble snowboarding today, Luckily Krystyn was able to capture the moment with her GoPro. She wasn’t able to get a picture of her face later, but she says the ol’ moneymaker is all scraped up. Too bad.
I don’t think I will ever tire of this photo. Thanks, Amber! You can come over to play anytime.
Cari, you are as lovely on the inside as you are on the outside.
It has been lovely being friends with Karen once again. Our back fence has a gate in it so we always used to be able to just run back and forth between our houses to borrow a cup of vodka or to share some news, and we have fallen right back into our old ways. With Röbert gone she has been coming by after the kiddos are in bed and we watch the educational channels on television together.
She has told me quite a bit about her dear friend Renata, and she desperately wanted us to meet, but Renata was hesitant. For some reason Renata thought I had a problem with her and was stalking her last year. A few unfortunate things did happen, but they were all Cari’s doing and I often begged Cari not to target poor Renata in that way. I now see what a cruel bitch Cari is, but at the time she was just my friend and I did what I could to protect Renata from her.
This morning Renata agreed to meet with me. Karen and I went to a new coffee shop in town where they also serve green juices (I got a delicious kale-tomato water-hot sauce cleansing one) and we spent the next hour just laughing our heads off. Renata is in the middle of planning her wedding (to possibly the stupidest man on earth, but that is neither here nor there) and we looked through a few magazines at dresses and flowers. Renata also had some observations about a mutual friend of ours, which I will share another time. All in all it was a fun morning and we are planning a girl’s night out soon!
I have a feeling we will make quite a team!
I was driving home from a light workout at the gym today and I saw my old pal, Karen the snake in the park with her new buddy, Renata. Can you imagine being so desperate for a friend that you would want to spend time with either of them? Besides being sneaky and dishonest they are two of the most tedious individuals known to man.
Renata appears to be doing a top rate job helping Karen lose weight, LOL!
I think I might try to befriend Karen again. I am sure she must miss me and it would be a hoot to hear all about Renata’s wedding plans. Maybe I could even get myself invited to the happy event and bring Ty as my plus one! LOL! LOL!
We had Amber over to play after school yesterday and she brought her Mummy’s high school yearbook. LOL!
Cari looks like she might have had some work done since she graduated in 1991. LOL! Is she turning 43 this year? LOL LOL!
Hottie, ready to party!
Since Cari has been so “difficult” lately, I decided to give some of my other gal pals a bit of a tryout as my new bestie. I called Krystyn this morning and we decided to go have coffee together after Rowing to Rap at the gym.
It was fun. She is a wicked gossip and had many unflattering things to say about Cari (I had, indeed, noticed that her butt is getting lumpy) but it just wasn’t the same. And she actually licked her finger after she touched the pastry we ordered to share, which I find so unnatural. It’s as if she wants to be overweight. You order pastries when you go out for coffee, but no one actually eats them.
Krystyn is great, and such a natural beauty, but I always feel like I want to talk behind her back.
I am calling Tabs on Monday and asking her to go on a run with me.
I have had the hardest time catching up with Cari over the last couple of weeks. I think she must be busting to tell me what she helped Röbby choose for my Christmas gift and she doesn’t want to ruin my surprise.
Yesterday I ran into Mitch at the nice mall with the Tori Burch shop. He told me that Cari had broken up with him last week, right after she heard from her lawyers about her inheritance from “James”. Interesting.
Cari and Mitch in happier times. Have I ever mentioned how wealthy he is?
I tried to call her several times, and I only got a text back that said “Luv ya! Busy! XOXO!”
So I called Krystyn who said she’d seen her at a new hot yoga I didn”t even know about. Apparently Cari has a hot new man who is MARRIED! She wouldn’t even tell Krystyn who he is. Now that she has money of her own she is planning to run away with with her new guy. They are waiting until the day after Christmas, so he can spend the holiday with his children. This is such crazy gossip that I can’t wait to hear all about it from her!
Of course I don’t believe in dating happily married men, but Cari is such a free spirit and does whatever she pleases.
I don’t think I shared with all of you the sad news that Cari’s dear friend “James” passed away from age related causes in a nursing home In October. “James” was a kind and very generous man and it is a shame that his selfish children kept him from his love, Cari, during the final days of his life.
I will never forget how terrifying it was to watch “James” drive.
Happily for everyone, “James” was able to change his will so that his children all got small bequests, but Cari was left the bulk of his estate. Of course she was shocked and never expected this windfall, but it would be silly to turn it down. She wanted to be fair, so she instructed her lawyers to negotiate a settlement with his family that would allow her to avoid drawn out lawsuits, and they begrudgingly agreed to allow her to give them back half of the estate. Ingrateful, spoiled family; you would think they’d be happy she decided to share. Despite all of this, she has ended up a very wealthy lady indeed. Such happy news for my BFF. I am in no way jealous of her good fortune.
Yesterday Cari called and said I was hogging all of the fun with Kathy, so the three of us went out for a gal pal day. We took Kathy to Sephora and let the girl with the stupid hair and the nose ring she believes makes her look edgy give her a makeover. LOL! You should have seen her with liquid eyeliner.
Then we went out for a lady’s lunch at the club. Kathy ordered a salad with dressing on it. Gross. Have you ever seen anyone do that? It looked so wet.
Anywho, once again she started boohooing about her marriage. This time it was all about how she wanted children and Stefan didn’t and how he didn’t respect her career and just wanted her to be free to travel with him all of the time. Well, that sounds awful. No kids. No job. Travelling the world with your wealthy husband. Poor Kathy! Couldn’t you just cry for the hardships she has faced?
Cari is such a sketch. She immediately started encouraging Kathy to have a child, maybe more than one. Oh yes! Children are such a joy, we told her. Maybe she should have several. “You don’t need a man!” Cari shouted. I thought I was going to wet myself. By the end of lunch we had found the number for social services and convinced her to try to adopt a sibling group. “Get a bunch of them at once! You will be doing such a generous thing.” Cari is hilarious. She even mentioned that one or two teenagers might be nice. LOLOLOL! They could babysit for the younger ones, right?
As much fun as it has been to have Kathy pour out her heart out to me, all good things must come to an end. She said it was time to go home and find a new place to live. I called a few rental agents for her and we even looked on Zillow for studio condominiums in depressing complexes near the third rate university where she teaches. Maybe she can live with one of her students and afford a one bedroom. LOL. I think we found one with one of those one piece showers and textured brown carpeting.
Röbert and I took her out to dinner last night. It was a really nice place, so of course she made her usual effort. Unfortunately her eyeliner had become smeared when she cried at lunch, so she went out with no makeup, as per usual.
Nice vest, Kathy. Is Kohls having another sale?
She left this morning, but I am looking forward to long phone calls and texts from her. Now that she has seen the light about Claire I expect we will be hearing from her a lot more. I can’t wait.
Yesterday afternoon Starling was complaining about being bored, so I sent her out with a lil’ art project. She took her camera and the telephoto lens and tried to get “arty” closeup shots of some of our neighbors. She caught Renata out looking for Dementor mid-afternoon. Poor Renata is not looking cute. Her skin is all broken out and she has dark circles under her eyes like she isn’t getting enough sleep. if I didn’t know better, I would say she contracted a bad case of pink eye too. Amber got it at horse camp last week, and Cari said you have to be very careful to change your sheets regularly. I hope she doesn’t end up with impetigo too, Amber also brought that back from horsey camp and it is very unsightly.
“Pretty Lady”
Amber and Starling were off to their art camp this morning, where I am sure they won’t be picking up skin diseases. It is a very high end and expensive camp. I raced over to drop Hummus at the gym and had a fun lunch with Cari and Krystyn. We were looking at funny pictures and laughing and laughing.
mythreeangles 